EFT FAQs

 

Many of these questions have fuller answers in my book Introducing EFT – a Practical Guide which you can buy from the Amazon widget down the right side of this page. 

How do I know what words to say?

This is the EFT paradox. The words matter, yet they do not matter at all. They are not a magic mantra, they are just a way of really focussing your attention on what you want to tap on. So describing that accurately to yourself helps put your attention where it needs to be. And only you really know what those words are. If you are feeling so emotional that your attention is really there anyway, you can use words as vague as “this feeling” or “all these feelings” because you do not need help directing your attention. Or, you can even tap without words.

There is a video explaining more about how to find the right words on the home page of this website.

 

Can I use EFT on anything?

For yourself, try it on anything. But be aware it is not necessarily a substitute for conventional treatment for, for example, medical conditions and does not claim to be. For other people, don’t go where you do not belong. If you are not a clinical psychologist or a psychiatrist you are not qualified to help people who have serious psychological or psychiatric problems, even if you are qualified to use EFT as a practitioner.

 

People say EFT is a one-shot wonder.  So why isn’t it for me? 

EFT is not a one-shot wonder. Just once in a while someone using it hits the jackpot. People always write up their spectacular successes. All the emotion around a single traumatic memory can often be detached really quickly, for example. But much EFT, like most therapy, is not as simple as that. People, and their problems, are too complex for a few rounds of tapping to undo years of negative experiences and patterns.

However, as an experienced therapist, I can say that it is faster than any other way of working that I have ever encountered.

 

How do I tap on a memory?

The simplest way is to use a technique called “the movie technique”, or, if it is a really biggie, there is an even safer and more distancing version called “the tearless trauma.” It you download my free eBook Getting Started with EFT (on the right) you will find a more detailed description.

On my courses, I teach and demonstrate this and give people the chance to practise. I also describe it in more detail in my chapter of the book EFT and Beyond. There is also what amounts to a masterclass on memories on my DVDs which you can order from my Tapping shop.

 

How do I tap on a memory when I am not sure if I really remember it?

It doesn’t matter what really happened. And it doesn’t matter if what you remember is “second-hand”, i.e. constructed from what others have told you or even if you have imagined it. It is what is stored in your head that counts. People have been traumatized by imagining things that did not happen to them at all.

 

Can EFT make people feel worse?

Sometimes when you tap on something it does make you feel worse. It doesn’t means that EFT is harming you in any way. It means it is taking you where you need to go next. EFT has that ability to track what you need to work on. So if you feel worse, regard it as an opportunity, and not a contra-indication. Hang in there and tap on what you are feeling now. Or, if you feel you are getting out of your depth, get professional help.

 

How can I learn more about EFT?

There are a multitude of resources available. You can see details of the courses I teach on my courses page. The introduction is both for people who want to learn more for their own use and for those who intend to go on to use EFT working with other people. Some do the next level to use it for themselves, too. Others do it and do case studies and an exam for practitioner certification

You can learn more from my own DVDs which are listed in my tapping shop. There are links to some other DVDs from there.

On the page Reading and DVDs if you scroll down a bit there is a list of recommended EFT books and DVDs.

 

How can I make my son/daughter/partner/parent use EFT?

You cannot. But you can tap on your own feelings about whatever it is that you would like them to tap on. Sometimes that makes more difference to them – as well as to you – than you might imagine. When you feel differently and interact with them differently sometimes things change because the dynamic has changed. That is a bonus if it happens. You can only really work to change yourself not others.

 

What is surrogate tapping?

Surrogate tapping is tapping on behalf of someone else, a bit like praying for or absent healing but with tapping giving it another dimension. If you are thinking of using it for someone close to you, it is always good to tap for your feelings about whatever it is you want to help them with first. Surrogate tapping is not for turning people into what you want them to be or getting them to behave as you want them to behave. It should be for what is really their highest good and it is less difficult to truly intend that if you have cleared your own feelings first.

 

How often do I need to tap?

That is the piece of string questions. But a little a day can keep a lot of things at bay…

 

I tapped and seemed to have got rid of a problem but it came back. Didn’t it work?

There are a dozen answers to this. Maybe there are aspects of the problem you did not clear up. Has the same part of the problem come back or a different one you did not tackle? Has the same feeling come back or is it a different one? Maybe what you tapped on is leading you to where you need to go next to find a more core issue?

And there are some things we do need to keep coming back to and tapping for again. Some physical ones, for example, need to be constantly “adjusted”. If you brushed your teeth would you expect not to have to do them again tomorrow? In the same way some physical conditions will keep going back to a default setting unless you tap repeatedly to change it.

 

How can I be my own therapist?

You will find my took Introducing EFT – a practical guide a great way to learn how to use EFT and how to apply it to a wide range of problems.  You can buy it from Amazon with one click on the orange box to on the right.

 

My chapter of the book EFT and Beyond (which you can also buy from Amazon or at my workshops) is all about being your own therapist. One thing, though – if you do set out to do this I think you owe it to yourself to promise yourself that if you get into deeper water than you thought you would, you will get professional help.

 

How many sessions would I need with a therapist?

This is the other piece of string question. No two people or the history and geography of their problems are alike, even if the symptoms on the surface seem the same. So no therapist can tell you in advance how many session you will need.

When I work with clients, I let them tell me how many sessions they want and how they want to organise them. They can space their sessions as much as they want or need to do. And they can do as much homework as they want.